Utter Waste of Time, in Every Sense of the Word

With the upcoming theatrical release of The Dark Knight, it was no surprise that Warner Bros would start churning out every bit of marketing that they could. Thus, to double dip in the same area as the Animatrix, I was actually somewhat looking forward to the release of Batman: Gotham Knight. I wasn’t the biggest fan of the Animatrix, but I had enjoyed killing that hour of time with something so beautifully drawn and directed. Unfortunately, the same cannot be said for Gotham Knight.

I won’t waste anyone’s time by trying to tell you about a plot here, because honestly there wasn’t one. Gotham Knight is seven different short stories that all have some coherent tie-in to one another. Each is less enjoyable than the one that came before it, with the exception of the final part which is actually mildly entertaining. This is nothing like the Animatrix; there are no tie-ins to The Dark Knight. There is no collaboration between the two in the slightest. Each one is simply just a ten minute waste of your time and only serves for Warner Bros to cash in on their next big cow.

Each segment had a different director, and thus each style was a little different. The multiple segments had multiple ways of detailing Batman, ranging from a shadowy bog to him decked out in metal armor. Each of these variations got on my nerves more than anything. I didn’t find them interesting nor visually stimulating. Instead, I grew quite tired of seeing such an iconic character drawn in so many silly ways. I wasn’t sure which was more insulting; the over-the-top ways of drawing Batman, or the ridiculous ways in which Americans were depicted (especially in the first act). Apparently we’re all overweight, oddly shaped, and have small arms.

There really is very little positive to say about this experience. If it weren’t for the fact that I planned on reviewing it, I would have turned it off after just twenty-five minutes. This film in no way, shape, or form got me excited to see The Dark Knight. I can’t see this appealing to kids and it certainly isn’t filmed in a style suitable for children. It’s very adult themed, yet also very pointless.

The one redeeming facet of it all was the voice talent of Kevin Conroy as Batman/Bruce Wayne. I grew up with Conroy voicing the old Batman: Animated Adventures and it was a pure delight to hear him again as the caped crusader. Conroy’s voice has the perfect pitch to work as both Wayne and The Bats, which says a lot about his talent. It’s just a shame it was wasted on this tripe.

Save your money. Save your time. Go and watch some old Batman cartoons, or worse, the old 60s Batman show. There are heaps and bounds more entertainment to be found within those gems than this garbage. It’s a safe assumption, as well as a certainty, that The Dark Knight will be better than this. And who knows, maybe that was Warner Bros intentions in the first place.